Adapted Growth

One of the traits of a successful salesperson is acceptance, even when it's difficult.
Photo by Ryan Franco on Unsplash


If you’ve been reading my blogs for a while, you’ve probably seen the ones talking about what I believe to be the various essential traits of a successful salesperson.

I came up with an acronym that lists these traits and embodies what a salesperson does. They use their knowledge and experience to lead people in the right direction and help them make the best decisions. 

That acronym is SHERPA. I’ve already covered Skeptical, Helpful, Empathetic, Resolute, and Practiced. (I’ll include a list with links below.)

The last vital trait to being a Sales Sherpa is acceptance, especially accepting of things you cannot control.


Being Accepting in Sales


In sales, you have to learn to accept a lot. But this is one of the traits that even an already successful salesperson might not talk about or use themselves. 

Too often, salespeople are told to follow up with prospects endlessly, don’t take no for an answer, assume the sale, and try to sell their product or service to everyone they meet. 

And we wonder why the general public doesn’t trust us.

For years, I did the same. I was taught and trained to do these things in my early sales roles. Every single time a prospect said no, I would beat myself up about what I must have done wrong or what I must have missed. No matter how much I improved, how much more I learned about selling, I still struggled every time I heard ‘no.’

But between further improvement in my selling processes and gaining more confidence in myself in my different roles, I slowly realized that there’s nothing you can do to make somebody say yes.

We don’t have mind control. Even when we do influence somebody to change their mind or say yes to something they weren’t planning on purchasing, it’s still their decision. We might have just helped them come to it. 

The more you realize you have no direct control over their decision, the easier it is to accept their answer.


Start with Empathy


Even more important than accepting it, though, we must empathize with their reasoning. (Hint: If you missed it above, this is one of the other crucial traits of a successful salesperson!)

Sometimes, saying no really is the best decision for them. Maybe we work in a way that doesn’t work for them. Perhaps their budget is too tight to support the expense. Or maybe they simply don’t want it.

Instead of trying to change their mind, empathize with their decision and ask questions to determine the thinking behind them. This can be enormously helpful for you because there may be a missed you can fix, which reopens the opportunity to work together. Or it might be something that you can adjust for your next prospect. Whatever it is, even if it has nothing to do with you, gaining some understanding will help you maintain trust and the relationship.

Plus, it’ll allow you to improve your next sales conversation. You either get the practice of dealing with a common problem, or you can add a new objection to your sales process.

In any other situation, you wouldn’t want to try and force yourself onto somebody else. Why is it okay in sales?

The obvious answer is that it’s not. It’s gross in any other aspect and just as disgusting in sales. It’s a massive part of what continues to give salespeople a bad name.

If you want to be a part of the solution, accept and respect your prospects’ decisions.


Ask More Questions


If we want to help people, we may have to go into the conversation being skeptical about their answers. That leads us to ask more questions until enough trust is built from both sides to determine their real pains and needs. 

But no matter how great their needs are or how much we can help them, they have to accept the help before they can give you a comfortable and eager yes. If the motivation isn’t there or the pains or needs aren’t great enough, you shouldn’t want them to say yes. They’re not qualified to be a great client.

Here’s the thing: when you can learn to accept that you can’t change people’s minds, it will make your life a lot easier, in and out of sales.


Things You CAN Control


Luckily, you CAN control plenty of things that will make accepting a no much easier.

  1. You can control how full your pipeline is, especially since there’s a volume component to sales anyway. No salesperson ever closed every single deal. And with a robust enough pipeline, the pressure to try significantly lessens.
  2. You can control your CRM. When you do a great job of notating your actions and process, you’ll feel comfortable knowing you’re doing everything you should be.
  3. You can control your process. If you follow a regular strategy with every prospect, then you’ll decrease the opportunities for them to say no for the wrong reasons. Know what objections you’re likely to encounter, and include questions in your process that address them before they make a decision. It’s not mind-control, but it does increase your chances of making the sale.
  4. You can control your reactions and emotions. Even if you don’t understand their reasons for turning you down, you can still keep the possibility for future work or referrals open as long as you accept the no gracefully.


Being more accepting in sales takes time!


Acceptance is a skill we all have to learn. No child is born being able to quietly accept a no from a parent when they ask for a cookie. And even the best salespeople struggle with rejection occasionally.

The truth is, you’re going to get a lot of noes, probably more noes than yeses. But if you’re good at what you do, you already know that, and you’re prepared for it. If you’re great, then you make sure every one of your prospects knows that they can honestly tell you no. That alone will make them open to talking to you more than any other salesperson they’ve dealt with.

And who knows, it will probably make at least some of them less likely to turn you down.


Read about other traits of a successful salesperson in these SHERPA articles.

Find out what being a Sales Sherpa means and how this sales method can help you improve all of your relationships.

The S in SHERPA stands for Skeptical, the (positive!) mindset you need to have effective sales conversations.

H stands for Helpful because your intent drives your ability to be the best salesperson you can be.  

One of the most important characteristics of successful salespeople is Empathy.

Another trait that makes a sales rep successful is being Resolute.

P represents Practiced since learning how to do anything takes practice, including becoming a successful sales rep.